Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Re: We Are Under attack by the LGBTPed Community

On the average Wednesday I tend to ignore Yeshiva World News but today Rabbi Yair Hoffman's cry about religious freedom being under attack because telling underage minors that they can be cured from being gay is becoming more and more frowned upon (for good reason).

Let's just cut to the chase on this one:

-Religious freedom doesn't give you the right to promote unlicensed self proclaimed professionals to tell kids who are already confused that their sexuality is their fault and is something that can be cured.

-Religious freedom doesn't mean that you can send your kids to anyone you want for treatment, especially if this treatment is known to cause serious harm to many (myself included).

-Forcing children into conversion therapy against their will is NOT a parent's right, and any parent who tries to do this to their children should be prosecuted for child abuse.

I wonder if Rabbi Hoffman is concerned about the countless underage LGBT kids that are kicked out of their homes, yeshivas and communities because of their orientation.

I also wonder if Rabbi Hoffman is concerned about the methods that these so called professionals use, including but not limited to blaming their parents for their orientation, and most notably being coerced to strip naked in a locked room with an unlicensed "professional".

Stop using religious freedom as an excuse to justify abuse. If a cancer patient (a REAL illness) who is a minor is forced by his parents to see a self proclaimed professional and not a real doctor to deal with his illness and then they die, thees parents would be easily liable for his death. In this case, there is no real illness other than the potential long term very harmful effects of such so called therapies.

It would be in Hoffman's best interest to focus on real problems facing religious communities if that's what he really cares about.

http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/editorial/210374/op-ed-we-are-under-attack-by-the-lgbtped-community.html

Ps. It's LGBTQIA (if you cared) - the added PED is not only not funny but also indicative of how quickly people seemed to forget that the nazis came for the Jews and for gay people too.

8 comments:

  1. The quality of this blog continues to get worse in content and form. Articulate people who know the importance of mechanics and editing are better suited to responding to bigots. Bigots will think all gays are scattered ADD idiots out to make a name for themselves. More care is given to the self serving entries. You should focus on those even more.

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    1. Awwww you're too flattering. I like to think that my writing has actually become more articulate over the last two years as i've grown as a person and a writer but thanks for leaving such lovely anonymous feedback.

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    2. It looked fine to me: articulate, coherent and most important convincing. I'm glad you could make light of it, though.

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    3. A few examples:

      "On the average Wednesday I tend to ignore Yeshiva World News but today Rabbi Yair Hoffman's cry about religious freedom being under attack because telling underage minors that they can be cured from being gay is becoming more and more frowned upon (for good reason)." What? Run on. Commas?

      "thees"? "These."

      "I wonder if Rabbi Hoffman is concerned about the countless underage LGBT kids that are kicked out of their homes, yeshivas and communities because of their orientation." It's "whether" not "if". It's "who" not "that".

      "Stop using religious freedom as an excuse to justify abuse." Who are you writing to? You were writing about Hoffman. Now, you write to him?

      What's with the hyphens? We use words to put our thoughts together in writing; nobody uses hyphens to outline. When did you stop writing and start outlining?

      etc, etc, etc

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    4. Awwww Thanks anonymous!

      I'm glad you found something productive for a few minutes. Back to crossword puzzles now I guess?

      xo

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    5. Candy Crush, actually. That would be more productive than giving you notes which you will only ignore because you are self satisfied as the earlier anonymous pointed out and you affirmed. You used to be well written, or what you posted was well written.

      :-*

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    6. My stalker would love to believe that.

      Delete
  2. An Orthodox friend of mine forwarded me this post. I really ought not to respond to it, but I think the entire discussion about JONAH and counseling for confused teens needs to take into account complexity. It seems that the people bringing this suit and militating against ex-gay therapy are convinced that no youth ever has same-sex attraction and would be better off refraining from homosexual activity.

    I am not an ex-gay, so I cannot claim to speak for or even understand that position. But my own life experience does bear upon the question of when such therapy might be beneficial.

    I became sexually active with men when I was thirteen and remained highly involved in homosexual sex for the fifteen ensuing years. During all that time, I never had a relationship with a male anywhere near my age (they were, with a few exceptions, decades older), and actually no relationship that ever lasted more than a few weeks. Most interactions with men actually lasted for only 1-4 "encounters."

    By my late teens I experienced revulsion and nausea when I was with men but I could not stop having gay sex. It was compulsive. By my early 20s, I had to take poppers or be extremely drunk to have sex with men, and even then, I still often had to stop because I felt nothing, or I felt nauseous, or revolted by what I was doing.

    I believed in the same ideology you trumpet -- namely, that if you have been aroused by males and had sex with them, you must be gay, and any attempts to be with girls must be the result of self-denial. So the deeper I sank into this gay lifestyle, the more I kept blaming myself for the unhappiness by saying I needed to work harder to accept what I was doing.

    Then at the age of 28 I had sex with a woman, fell in love, stopped feeling nauseous about sex, didn't have to do drugs to be intimate, and gradually, over the next 12 years, felt the urges to be with men dwindle until they disappeared.

    I never sought counseling to stop being with men. It just happened. But if I had had a counselor who could have helped me work through everything back in 1984, when this all started, I would not have wasted 15 years of my life trying to be gay when my primary inclination is toward women. I call myself bisexual and claim membership in the LGBT community; my wife knows everything; I do not denounce what I did. But objectively speaking, they were lost years.

    It is fundamentally cruel and tyrannical on your part that you want to ban all counseling that could help youths who might be in the position I was in when I was 13. There are some people for whom that counseling could be helpful and appropriate. Maybe for some people, the drive to have gay sex won't go away, but they are better off staying out of the gay community anyway--like if they are prone to having risky sex, or they are vulnerable to self-esteem issues in the image-conscious gay world, or they really want to have children with a woman. There are sexual abuse victims or people with personality disorders such as Histrionic Personality Disorder that cause sexual confusion as well; some of these are people who need help avoiding the gay scene because it will simply compound the problems they have.

    Be kinder to your fellow man. I understand that the op-ed is inflammatory, but try not to base all your beliefs on reacting to what's most incendiary. Instead, be open to more sides. I've struggled with my desire to find absolutes on sexuality issues as well. I have struggled with the urge to be destructive toward others whose disagreement threatens me. It's a lifelong fight against those human urges that end up closing us off and isolating us. But I hope you can struggle too and learn to be more open.

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Feel free to post any comment or questions. Negative commentary that does not serve a useful purpose will be deleted.